Man bites dog

OK, I’ll admit that the whole “OMG! Obama ate dog!” thing is pretty stupid, but then so is the “Seamus rode on the top of the car, as cold as a Bain Capital man’s heart” thing. But you know, we didn’t start the whole “Candidate hates animals” war. I deal with a person who is still convinced that Sarah Palin personally shot wolves from a helicopter, just because she could.  I could well see her believing “Obama ate dog!” without any of the qualifiers. Maybe this will lose him some of the orthodox Muslim vote, or confuse the “Obama is a Muslim” crowd. Not a bad thing. And interestingly, the passage from “Dreams” talks about the belief that one takes on the qualities of the animals one eats…which means that our President is, a ritual sense, a dog.

Is this manufactured outrage somehow wrong? I dunno; I’m just playing by the rules…you know, these rules?

RULE 5: Ridicule is man’s most potent weapon.
RULE 6: A good tactic is one your people enjoy.

UPDATE: more tasty Photoshops here.

Malcolm XI

I am ROTFLMAO over this video explicating the physical resemblance between Malcolm X and Pres__ent Øbama. Clearly, this is a racist argument. I don’t care how “the brother” lecturing in the video is dressed or how he sounds…he looks like a honky to me. Granted. the photos are suggestive, though the Ferrous One’s sardonic response was “They all look alike to me.” It’s no more a stretch to believe that Stanley Ann Dunham bore Malcolm X’s love child, or raised another woman’s, that to believe some of the other theories about this strange man we’re saddled with. I absolutely draw the line though at the notion that the kid was specifically bred to become President. Too much could have gone wrong; a proper conspiracy would have bred dozens of racially-grievanced, power-hungry, rootless and confused narcissists to run the country. And if you’ve come with me this far, that last line made you sweat.

A citizen does his duty for WalmarTSA

“Anonymous said…
Last week I got coffee in Litchfield – while there I saw this suspicious looking guy, kinda fat, red jacket and pants with a white beard. He even waved at me. I headed north to the new Wally World where, lo and behold, there’s this same dude, following me down the aisle. WTF? Being a good subject, I immediately found a store management type (I know this because she was watching two others work) and told her about this guy; I even pointed him out. She started laughing. I, of course, was NOT smiling. As far as I know she is still laughing. At least she was when I walked away from her. Nonetheless, I felt better for having turned in a very suspicious looking character.
December 9, 2010 6:50 AM”

This IS no laughing matter. This guy routinely violates US airspace and so far has not only not been shot down, but has never even been through TSA screening…I mean, think of what could be hidden in that belly! Further, he claims to have detailed information on who has been bad and good, and their deepest desires. Not even Julian Assange can claim that. Further, by distributing unearned and undeserved largesse, he’s impersonating a government official (though I don’t know what’s with the red clothes…you’d think he’d lose weight, shave, black his face and get fake elephant ears to go with his impersonation, if he really wanted to be convincing.). Oh yeah, and pandering…he’s got to be a pimp with a get-up like that, and all that talk of “ho ho ho”. He’s not a citizen, but I’ll bet there’s a cell at Gitmo with his name on it.

UPDATE: Vanderbeogh has a suggestion for helping Walmart and the TSA.

No pressure…right?

Alvie just made himself a meme:

That’s a lot of blood wasted that could be used to prop up a sick Senator or other vampire, though.

(If you’ve been away from the Net and don’t get it, click here.)

WJB III wins friends and influences people, chapter 97403

Facebook is a wonderful thing; it causes friends of a mutual friend to meet each other, sometimes at high velocity without seatbelts.

Sorry, [redacted], you can’t do that [because I unfriended him first -JAQ]

Hey, if it had been me on your thread beating on your friends, you’d be within your rights. But you came onto my thread, looking for a challenge, and a challenge found you. You might turn a search engine to “Billy Beck” some day; you’ve encountered an Internet legend. I’m not inclined toward censorship, or flushing things down the memory hole. And you’ve shown yourself to be allied to those who are so inclined.  It’s probably best that we don’t interact politically.

On Mon, Oct 4, 2010 at 5:17 PM, [redacted] wrote:

Jeff:
I don’t need insults from some two-bit whack-job on Face-Book. You will delete the string that he and I have gotten into or you will be “de-friended”.

I respect you as a fellow musician in this town, and although I might disagree with your political views, I have until now, understood these views, as mistakened as they may be. You have been at least civil, but to endorse your buddy today negates that perception.

I will not tolerate being called a “commie” by some punk who doesn’t even know who I am.  I’m fucking serious.

Thanking you in advance for your time and consideration, I remain-

Very Truly Yours,

A damned shame… a decent chap overall, and an excellent tenor. But really, what did he expect, and what did he think I was made of? He’s not the first person I’ve blown off when they commanded me to change a Net post.

And remember, those “commies” own us already, as China holds most of our debt.

Billy Beck: Hokay, then. You’re all set. Good luck.

That was the place where a wise man would have stopped.

UPDATE:  [redacted] wanted to make nice, asked me to lunch to talk. And hey, I was cool with that; I was really not upset with the guy at all. But then he called me back, saying “I’ve got a lot of musical contacts in this town; I’ve gotten a program or two cancelled.” and talking all worried that “that nutjob” was going to show up to lunch. I’m seeing a guy go into full meltdown over a stranger on the Internet calling him a “Commie”….act as if he were being bullied, and respond by bullying himself. I’m sorry, but that’s not psychological health. And I’ve really got to worry about this guy…for his sake and for mine.

I’m putting this out there so that, if I end up dead in an alley somewhere, y’all can have the cops subpoena my Facebook account.

Kishnevi on Beck on Commager

Kishnevi has closed his comments, so I actually have to post something here.

He makes an interesting point that the America of the 1890s was much more like now than that of the 1870s because of external technological and geopolitical factors. All true, but he really doesn’t tie that to a difference in thinking, because he neglects the various side-dramas of that Big Picture. For example, America as an industrial powerhouse required importation of lots of cheap labor, primarily from Slavic countries, who both brought in and were susceptible to Marxism. We were also digesting the Germans of ’48-65, and adding to them, and in spite of being one, I have to admit that the German influence on America was not entirely beneficial. (Proponents of free immigration of Latinos ignore the German experience, because to their minds, there was no downside to adding masses who were recently serfs to a country founded by Celtic rebels.) Mass immigration called forth public education (beginning with the Irish in the 1850s) to teach new citizens English and the American culture, or at least the government-supported myth version of American culture. Likewise, America as a military powerhouse was also related to industrialization. We needed markets for our goods and sources for raw materials, in an age where tariffs were falling, and colonialism was mercantilism by other means.

A modest proposal for the neighborhood of the Ground Zero mosque.

I’m announcing tonight, that I am planning to build and open the first gay bar that caters not only to the west, but also Islamic gay men. To best express my sincere desire for dialogue, the bar will be situated next to the mosque Park51, in an available commercial space.

This is not a joke. I’ve already spoken to a number of investors, who have pledged their support in this bipartisan bid for understanding and tolerance.

I don’t see why anyone would object. Justin Raimondo tells us that the new building will actually be the Islamic equivalent of a YMCA, and he would surely know about those. So possibly there will be a divided market. But Raimondo claims there actually is a mosque already within 4 blocks of Ground Zero, so apparently there’s a large underserved community, one which also needs dog boarding kennels and sausage shops.

At Hot Air, they’re trying to find a name for the place.

He takes after his mom

OK, this is scurrilous gossip, and I’m about the last person who should be spreading it, but apparently public policy is not the only area where Obama doesn’t measure up.

Whip o’ the morning

Rock on, Chuck [Schumer], rock on. You make that whiny thimble-headed gherkin from Minnesota who was foisted upon the upper chamber look positively deep-fried in gravitas by comparison.

In-your-face humor for the Brady Bunch

Another nail in the coffin of the “firearm as prosthetic penis” meme:

In the end I carry a pistol, because as impressive as my penis is, I can’t ejaculate at 1085 fps to neutralize an attacker. If I could I would go around with a big “B” on my chest. Bukkake man, justice is cumming…

It’s a situation where “hair-trigger response” might actually be advantageous.

H/T: Venlet