A Pee hack writes about Grammy Sarah

What a lovely opening sentence from the A Pee writer:”The teenage daughter of Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, whose quest for the vice presidency began to go downhill the day she announced the pregnancy, has given birth to a son, a magazine reported Monday.” The insertion of the unnecessary (and untrue) parenthetical opinion leads to an ambiguous sentence structure (was it Sarah or Bristol who was running?). If the writer was important enough to have an opinion worthy of public notice (in violation of Strunk and White’s style rule 17), she should have had a byline, so I would know to whom I should send a copy of “Elements of Style”.

There are a further three paragraphs (out of 13) with extraneous information about people not really part of the story. I have to wonder if this writer would write this lede for a Caroline Kennedy story: “The niece of Sen. Edward Kennedy, whose political career was damaged by an automobile accident at Chappaquiddick MA which led to the death of a young woman, is seeking an appointment as Senator from New York.” Since this is obviously the type of professional MSM style to which all bloggers should aspire, perhaps we should add such a parenthetical to any mention of Princess Caroline. Sauce for the goose, and all…


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: