Register as a subversive in South Carolina:UPDATED

South Carolina, the state so culturally beknighted that Christianists chose it to be their Free State-antithesis, has recently passed a law, stating:

Every member of a subversive organization, or an organization subject to foreign control, every foreign agent and every person who advocates, teaches, advises or practices the duty, necessity or propriety of controlling, conducting, seizing or overthrowing the government of the United States, of this State or of any political subdivision thereof by force or violence or other unlawful means, who resides, transacts any business or attempts to influence political action in this State, shall register with the Secretary of State on the forms and at the times prescribed by him.

Since none of us knows when our business might take us to SC, and since I would hope that most readers of this blog would like to “overthrow” the Federal government (preferably by simply ignoring it) and are good law-abiding citizens, perhaps we should all download and fill out the form and send it in with our $5, so that some unemployed burrowcrat can have work. After all, it’s not like actual subversives (e.g., Al Qaeda members) are going to register, and how will they know there are subversives if their paperwork is not in order?  They might accidentally arrest a non-registered subversive and pop them $25K/10 years in jail for not filling out a simple form.

Would they arrest you for claiming to be a subversive when you aren’t really a subversive? Of course not! They even say so:

SECTION 23-29-30 Effect on freedom of press or speech.

Nothing in this chapter shall be construed to authorize, require or establish censorship or to limit in any way or infringe upon freedom of the press or of speech as guaranteed by the Constitution of the United States and no regulation shall be promulgated hereunder having that effect.

So, boys and girls, send in as many forms as you want. Send one in for each of your subversive pets. Better still, send one in the name of your least-favorite Congresscritter; after all, they’re the ones who are really destroying this country. But remember to include the $5; bureaucracy is expensive, you know.

UPDATED: Duh! This is apparently a Lefty slur. The law IS on the books; however, it’s apparently a holdover from anti-Communist days in the 50s (as opposed to anti-Communist days now). It’s still a stupid law, but nobody now in the SC legislature was responsible for it.

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